


Loosing Myself

by FrozenMira



Category: Jacksecticeye, Video Blogging RPF, Youtubers, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Also this takes place when they first met in person?, Anti - Freeform, Best Friends, Blood and Gore, Body Horror, Changing POV, Dark, Darkiplier - Freeform, Eventual Happy Ending, Friendship, Gen, Jacksetpticeye, Markiplier - Freeform, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Tags Are Hard, There will be death, accents are hard, antisepticeye, probably?, why are so many of my fics at pannels?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-16
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-24 20:55:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9786731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrozenMira/pseuds/FrozenMira
Summary: Mark and Sean meet in person first time. They become friends, but something just seems off. Will Mark be able to keep his thoughts at bay? Will Sean let his own inner voice have it's way?





	1. Preparing

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how often I'll update this. 
> 
> But uh, enjoy?

_“You know, fighting is only going to get you so far.” The outline of a man stood over Jack, who was lying bloodied on the ground. The man let out a laugh as he pulled a knife out of his pocket and crouched down. “Look at how far your fame got you, punk.” He pushed the knife into Jack’s chest._

 

Jack awoke quickly to the sound of his alarm going off. Looking around, he realized that it was all just a dream. He ran a hand through his hair as he got up, blanket falling to the floor, before walking into his bathroom. Turning the water on, he ran his hands under them, then splashed his face. The water was cold, but it was waking him up.

“Fuckin’ hell. One of these days I need ta stop playin' games right before bed.” He said, shaking his head and walked back to his room.

He glanced over to his phone, seeing that it had a notification, it was a text message from Mark.

_Hey, not sure if you listen to the news much, but there is apparently some killings going on over there. Just be safe okay?_

Jack frowned, he had heard about the killings, but if Mark knew about them, then it meant that the killer still wasn’t caught. Generally the news didn’t reach outside of the country unless it was really severe. He quickly sent his friend a text back.

_Yeah I have heard about them. I don’t leave all that often so I should be fine, but thank you for worrying man._

Jack quickly pulled a new set of clothes on, grabbed his phone and left his room, walking down to his kitchen. Walking over to the cupboard, he pulled a bowl and a box of cereal out. He poured in some cereal, walked over to the fridge and opened it. 

“God damn it.” Jack swore as he noticed he was out of milk. He pushed the fridge door shut and looked at the time. 8:30 am. If he was quick he could beat the normal rush.

Sighing, Jack grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair and pulled it on as well as his favorite hat, and walked out the front door. He pulled his keys out of his jacket pocket, locked the door and turned to walk into town. 

 

Once in town he passed by a few people talking to the police. Normally he would just ignore it, but something deep inside him told him to check it out.

 

“He was home alone last night.. He normally is.” One of the women said to the officer who was writing it down. “Do.. Do you think it is the same guy?”

“Well ma’am, we can’t be sure, there is no indication of someone even being here last night. There was no forced entry, no fingerprints other than the deceased’s. “ The other officer spoke before adding. “We are really sorry for your loss and we will keep you in the loop if we find anything out.”

 

The same feeling that made Jack interested seemed to have be sated, and Jack continued on his way to the store. As he walked he passed a few more people, but nothing else caught his eyes. He smiled once he got to the shop and noticed there was only a few people. As he walked in and made his way to the cooler, he felt his phone go off with a Skype call from Mark. 

“Hey what's up? Isn’t it pretty late over there?” Jack asked as he answered the call.

 

“Yeah, but isn’t it like really early over there? You’re never up this early” Mark laughed before adding, “Just wanted to know if you’re down to game tonight, Bob and Wade want to play Prop Hunt, and it's been a while..” his voice trailed off. “We all miss hanging out man.”

Jack pulled a 4 pint carton of milk out before shutting the door. “Hell yeah I’d be down! I don’t have a lot goin' on today, so I shouldn’t be too worn out.” He smiled as he walked over to the cashier, handing her the carton. “Did ya only want to Prop Hunt or did ya want to play some other games as well?”

The cashier smiled and told Jack the total and put the carton in a bag.

Jack pulled his wallet out, took his debit card and swiped it.

“Umm. nothing else was really talked about, but I’m sure the guys would be cool to hang and do other games too.” Mark replied before adding “Are you out and about, your mic sounds different.”

Jack switched his phone to his other hand, and typed in his pin. “Yeah, ran out of milk and forgot to pick some up, and fuck if I am eating cereal without milk man. Shit is too dry.” He thanked the cashier and grabbed his bag. “Also took ya long enough, ya big goof.”

Jack walked out of the store and started on his way home.

“Well excuse me for not knowing, it's not like we’ve talked at all lately.” Mark complained.

“And who’s fault is that huh? Definitely not mine, you’re the one that is out doing meetups and collaborating with everyone, leaving poor ol’ Jackaboy to be alone all the time.” Jack said before letting out a small laugh, “I’m glad we get to talk today though.”

Jack pulled his keys out before realizing how long him and Mark had been talking. “Dude, go to sleep it's like super late there.” He opened his door, walking in and closed it behind him, locking it.

 

Mark let out a sound somewhere in between a groan and a whine. “But I don’t want to stop talking, we haven’t talked in sooooo long Jack.” 

“Mark go to bed man, we can talk tonight.” Jack said sternly.

Mark grumbled something about them not being alone before sighing, saying good night and hanging up.

 

Jack put his phone back into his pocket and poured some milk into the bowl from earlier. He put the carton away and grabbed a spoon out before eating.

 

Once Jack finished his breakfast he quickly cleaned the dishes, placed them on the counter to dry, and went up to his recording room. He pushed open the door and walked over to his computer, powering it on as he sat down in his chair. As his computer booted up, an odd thought passed through his head.

_Gaming with Mark tonight, and so soon to a convention? This isn’t one of your plans to get closer to him is it? You remember what happened last time you let someone in Seán._

Jack shook his head and leaned back into his chair. He knew this side of himself was just trying to keep him alone, and so far it had done a fantastic job. He couldn’t cancel the tickets now even if he wanted too, and that alone told him that he was right to not listen to these thoughts.

 

After what felt like hours of recording Jack received a message on Skype from Mark.

_Hey, we are ready, Bob and Wade just got up to get some water before we start, come join the call._

 

Jack felt himself smile and let go of a sigh he didn’t know he was holding in as he pressed the small green answer button.

 

“Jack! I wasn’t expecting you to join so quick. How was the rest of your day after the milk incident?” Mark said smiling into his camera. 

Jack flicked on his own camera before replying. “Nothin’ too special. Just prep for the con.”Jack ran a hand through his hair before continuing. “ ‘Bout the con, you guys planning anything other than the signings and the panel?”

 

Mark shook his head, “Nah, probably just going to walk the floor, maybe some other stuff. Haven’t really thought too much about it.”

 

Just then Wade walked back into his room and settled down in his chair. “Oh you got Jack in here quick. I wasn’t expecting to see him in here for a while.”

 

“Well you know Mark. He can be a pain if you don’t agree quickly.” Jack laughed before adding, “Besides, I was done with everything else anyways.”

 

A few minutes of small talk and banter passed while they waited for Bob to come back. As soon as Bob joined the group the four launched Garry's Mod and got into a private server.

 

“On go.” Mark said, “1.. 2.. 3.. Go.”

As soon as the word go left his mouth, all four of them started their own recording and rattled off their intro’s. It quickly devolved into laughter as Jack’s into was heard over all of the others’ with no problem.

“Jeez Jack, leave the loudness for later man. We just started!” Mark teased as he let out a laugh. “Oh Jack, you’re on my team for once! Okay now we just gotta not screw this up!”

 

“I’m not gonna screw it up, you’re usually the one that screws it up.” Jack replied calmly.

 

After about three hours of game play everyone agreed that they should be done. Bob and Wade both said their goodbyes and quickly logged off.

 

“Well, now that it’s just the two of us.” Mark said, his tone lowering into his more seductive tone. “You looking forward to the con? I know you mentioned that you’d be cool with sharing a room, but are you still sure?”

Jack let out a small laugh “Yeah I’m sure. I shouldn’t have a problem dealin’ with you for a few days.”

 

“Hey…” Mark’s voice was softer and let out a pout. “No need to be so mean” He let out a laugh before smiling widely. “Nah it's cool. I can’t wait to talk to you in person!”

 

Jack smiled, “Yeah same, it’ll be awesome.”

 

“Well I am going to let you go to bed, sleep well Jack.” Mark smiled and waved before hanging up the call.

 

Jack let out a small sigh as he turned off his computer. He looked over the calendar on his wall before smiling at the date that was circled in marker. While there was only a few days left, Jack knew the next day and a half would be torture due to how much editing he had left to do. He let that thought pass as he walked out of his recording room into his bedroom and took his clothes off, then flopped into his bed.

_You know, I can’t help but think you’re ignoring me Seán. You know that’s a bad idea… I’m sure you remember the last time you let me think without you here to stop me._

“I’m not ignoring ya.. Just have a lot of other stuff on my mind.” Jack sighed as he looked over his social media. “Man how crazy have I gotten.. Talking ta my inner thoughts…”


	2. Mark the Date

After the recording session with Jack, Bob and Wade, Mark found himself staring at his computer background. Not even bothering to edit any of the footage the four of them just shot, he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes.

_That went well, eh Mark? Jack seemed a bit off today don’t you think, wonder if he is nervous to spend time together in person. Seeing as you are such an ‘idol’ to him, I’m sure he can’t ‘wait’ to see you at your worst!_

Mark let out a groan. “Shut up.. I don’t need this shit right now...” He slowly opened his eyes and leaned forward, turning off his computer. He took his glasses off and placed them on the desk as he got up off his chair. As he walked over to his bed he pulled his clothes off, leaving him in just his boxers, before he sat down on his bed.

_Come on Mark, you know better than to try to push me away. I am just trying to help you out here. You should probably let him know that you are going insane. Imagine how rough it would be on him if he found out while you were talking to me. Think of the looks he’d give you. Think of the things he’ll say! I can’t wait._

“Just stop talking…” Mark covered his eyes and laid down on his back. “I can’t tell him… He can’t know… Why can't you just leave me be?” He felt tears stream down his cheeks and on the palms of his hands. He couldn’t stop the whimper that left him as his thoughts darted around. What if Jack did find out? How would he take that one of his friends was going insane and talking to his thoughts? 

_Listen. From what I’ve seen of Jack, he won’t leave you over this. He’s way too nice of a guy._

Mark chewed on his lower lip before sitting up, and coughing. “Yeah.. You’re right…”

_Mark go on, sleep. We both need the rest, you have an entire day of editing ahead of you tomorrow. Unless you want to give me the go ahead to edit them while you let your mind rest?_

Mark looked down at his hands before nodding. “If you can, do that. I need all the rest I can get…”

 

Before Mark could continue his sentence he felt a strong, but dull pain forming in the back of his head. The pain quickly grew until everything went black. When he opened his eyes again, all his video had been edited and his normally talkative thoughts seemed to have gone quiet.

 

Glancing at the clock he noticed he had been out for almost a day. He quickly grabbed his phone and noticed he had ten new text messages as well as over twenty Skype messages. He decided to look over his texts first. Most were just asking how the rests of his day went, but he noticed he had 3 texts from Jack.

_Hey dude, Bob and Wade mentioned that they couldn’t get a hold of you, you doing okay?_

_Mark! Are you okay? Haven’t heard from you almost all day, getting worried here man._

_Mark. Call me as soon as you can._

 

Mark quickly dialed Jack’s number. The phone rang twice before the other picked up.

“Mark! You’re okay! Oh thank god. Dude where the hell did ya go ta? Wade and Bob have been freaking out, our group chat is insane.” Jack’s tone was worried, but he seemed to be happy that Mark was okay.

“I’m fine, just took a long nap after the games, and at some point I edited my videos? I don’t really know, I like just woke up..” Mark replied as he scratched his head. It wasn’t until now that he realized he was fully dressed.

“Dude, you better get packing! I’m sure your flight is soon, I know mine takes off in less than an hour.” Jack said, laughing. “Come on man, don’t tell me you’re getting cold feet now.”

“Pfft! Me, cold feet? Never. I wouldn’t miss the con for the world Jack. I can’t wait to get to hang out with you!” Mark smiled as he started to pack up a week's worth of clothing. “Wait, that means you're at the airport already right? Well shit, if I was out for another hour I would have had you super worried… I’m really sorry Jack.”

Jack let a laugh, “ Hey don’t worry ‘bout it man. We have a week ta make up for it!” A woman’s voice could be faintly heard over the phone, before Jack quickly continued. “Welp that is my flight, gotta cut this short. See ya at the hotel?”

Mark frowned but replied, “Yeah I’ll see you there. Have a safe flight Jack.” 

The two of them said their goodbyes before hanging up, letting Mark get back to packing. 

His phone went off with a Skype call, just as the bag was zipped shut. Mark quickly answered the call. “Hellloooo. I am alive, don’t freak out.”

Both Wade and Bob started to talk over each other, asking if Mark was okay, and if he was ready for the con. Mark was quick to reassure them that he was indeed okay and that he was ready.

Once Mark had convinced his two friend that he was okay, he hung up and grabbed his bag.

 

_Oh, good you woke up in time. I’m glad I didn’t have to wake you up, that wouldn’t have been pretty._

“Oh you’re awake? Thank you for editing my videos.” Mark stopped in his tracks before letting out a relieved sigh. “Was getting a little lonely without you here…”

_Oh I never leave, I was just resting. Don’t worry Mark, I’ll never leave you alone. I’m here forever. Now let's get going, our plane leaves soon, and the roads might be pretty bad this time of the night._

Mark nodded, he knew he was right, this time of the night was a pain to get to the airport in a timely manner. He pulled a hat on, grabbed his keys, and left his home. Opening the trunk he threw his bag in and closed it. 

The drive wasn’t too long, and traffic wasn’t too bad, making it so Mark got to the airport just in time to board. He quickly checked in at the desk, and hurried onto the plane and took his seat.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for sticking around. If you have any ideas, critiques, or just comments, I'd love to hear from you guys.
> 
> <3
> 
> -Mira


End file.
